Supporting Children During the War: Evidence-Based Guidance for Parents
Parents and caregivers often feel uncertain about how best to talk with children about war and violence. Although the instinct to protect children from frightening information is understandable, research shows that open, supportive communication is associated with better emotional outcomes for children exposed to conflict (Saltzman et al., 2017; Masten & Narayan, 2012).
Many children are already aware that a war is taking place. They may have seen news coverage, social media content, or heard conversations among peers and adults. When children’s fears and questions are not acknowledged, worries can intensify and feel overwhelming (Cantor et al., 2021).
How Children Typically Respond to War and Violence
Younger Children (Under Approximately 10 Years)
- Behavioral regression (e.g., bed-wetting, clinginess)
- Irritability or defiance
- Increased separation anxiety
Younger children often express distress through behavior rather than words (Pynoos, Steinberg, & Piacentini, 1999).
Older Children and Adolescents
- Withdrawal or mood changes
- Heightened emotional reactions
- Preoccupation with media coverage
- Avoidance of news or conversations
Both excessive monitoring and complete avoidance of information can be coping strategies (Ahmed et al., 2017).
Evidence-Based Strategies for Supporting Children
1. Listen First
Allow children to share what they are thinking and feeling. Research shows children benefit when adults respond to their specific concerns rather than assuming what they need (Lieberman et al., 2011).
2. Acknowledge Feelings
Normalize emotions such as fear, sadness, confusion, or anger. Suppressing emotions may increase anxiety over time (Gross & Thompson, 2007).
3. Provide Age-Appropriate Information
Clarify misinformation gently and offer factual explanations suited to your child’s developmental level (Wolmer et al., 2005). Avoid graphic details at any age.
4. Reassure Safety Realistically
Children experience lower anxiety when caregivers provide calm reassurance while avoiding unrealistic promises (La Greca et al., 2010).
5. Model Healthy Coping
Children learn emotional regulation by observing adults. Demonstrating calm problem-solving and healthy stress management supports resilience (Meyer & Morin, 2016).
6. Limit Media Exposure
Repeated exposure to distressing news content is linked to increased anxiety in children and adolescents (Holman et al., 2014). Monitor and limit media consumption when possible.
7. Maintain Routines
Consistent daily routines create predictability and a sense of safety during uncertain times (Currier et al., 2015).
8. Encourage Expression
Younger children may express emotions through drawing or play. Teenagers may prefer journaling, music, or conversation. Creative expression supports emotional processing (Stoffel & Cain, 2018).
9. Seek Additional Support When Needed
If distress is intense, prolonged, or interferes with daily functioning, consult a qualified mental health professional. Early intervention improves outcomes (Pfefferbaum et al., 2015).
Key Research Insights
- Open communication is protective against anxiety and post-traumatic stress (Saltzman et al., 2017).
- Perceived caregiver availability supports emotional recovery (Masten & Narayan, 2012).
- High levels of media exposure increase stress responses (Holman et al., 2014).
Final Thoughts
Children may raise their concerns during everyday moments — at bedtime, during meals, or on car rides. Your calm presence, honest communication, and consistent reassurance are among the strongest protective factors for your child’s emotional wellbeing.
Even during times of war and uncertainty, supportive relationships foster resilience and hope.
Selected References
Ahmed, O., et al. (2017). Trauma and coping in adolescents exposed to violence.
Cantor, J., et al. (2021). Children’s understanding of national and world events.
Currier, J. M., et al. (2015). Maintaining routine after traumatic events.
Gross, J. J., & Thompson, R. A. (2007). Emotion regulation: Conceptual foundations.
Holman, E. A., et al. (2014). Media exposure to collective trauma. PNAS.
La Greca, A. M., et al. (2010). Children’s post-disaster coping and adjustment.
Lieberman, A. F., et al. (2011). Talking with children about war.
Masten, A. S., & Narayan, A. J. (2012). Child development in the context of disaster, war, and terrorism.
Meyer, E. C., & Morin, R. (2016). Parental coping and child outcomes.
Pfefferbaum, B., et al. (2015). Post-traumatic stress in children after disasters.
Pynoos, R. S., et al. (1999). Psychological interventions for traumatized children.
Saltzman, W. R., et al. (2017). Supporting children after terrorism and mass violence.
Stoffel, C., & Cain, R. (2018). Art therapy with children after trauma.
Wolmer, L., et al. (2005). Child resilience following war exposure.